Robert Dam's story of (non) Justice

My initial experiences with Dianetics and Scientology

My name is Robert Dam. I am New OT V. I was born in 1964 in Denmark. I am married and we have two daughters. I write this in English even though most people I know are Danish. What I am about to tell could have the interest of people from other countries and most of my Danish friends anyway speak English pretty well.

This is my story for good and bad with the Church of Scientology which I joined in 1984.

In March 1984 something happened that completely changed my life. I joined Scientology. I was approached on the street and recognized the Dianetic symbol straight away. I had seen a postcard with the word Dianetics and the volcano and instinctively knew that this was something for me. I bought two copies of Dianetics the Modern Science of Mental Health and got an OCA personality test.

When I came back to have the test evaluated I got the first serious eye-opener..
Jan Hansen, the person evaluating the test, was really spot-on. He saw all my personal problems and indicated them to me. It was too precise and I chose to refuse everything he said, but I knew it was true.

When I left the organization that night I felt more happy than I had felt for a very long time. I was convinced that my life could be improved, that my problems could be solved. I hardly felt the ground under my feet as I walked home. It was a beautiful spring sunset in Copenhagen and Robert Dam had been rehab'ed as a thetan (thetan = spiritual being).

After reading a few chapters in my new book I joined staff at DK Day Organization. The first period I was in Division 6 which was a real challenge and I learned a lot about communication. But I was carrying a half way criminal background which was fortunately discovered just before I blew staff. The Qual Sec, Jesper Christensen, the HAS, Henrik Larsen and the Treasury Sec, Peter Jensen, took full responsibility and made me do an O/W write up which was then submitted to the police. There was a court case and everything was sorted out. It was hard to confront, but I was very happy that I had now come clean with society. This was my first huge win on applying LRH's ethics conditions. I also did a Repair of past Ethics Conditions and that was great too.

Later I received various Auditing actions (Auditing = spiritual counseling) which was great and lifted quite some weight off my back.

Then I came to HCO (the personell division) as the HCO Area Secretary. It was part of a project to establish a strong HCO. It was going pretty okay and we had all HCO director posts filled with fully hatted personnel. The org grew to 53 staff before I left. I know I was the most successful HAS since the early eighties, because several years after I left, I was called up by a new HAS. She said that she was doing her birthday game management program and that one target was to get hold of the most successful HAS (per statistics) and get a full hat turnover. I went to the org and gave her the hat turnover. She apparently didn't make it because I was again called up for the same reason a few years later, by a new HAS.

The reason I left staff was that I had gotten into a disagreement with my senior, Søren Kiersgaard, whom I otherwise quite liked. My first 2½ years staff contract had just expired and I re-entered into a new contract on the agreement that I had a Leave of Absence for 3-5 month first. I needed to pay back some debts. I had it planned so that I could spend the first week of my Leave of Absence full time on study to finish my current course, but that, for some reason, upset my sernior so much that he cancelled my Leave of Absence entirely and ordered me back on post. I then cancelled my staff contract and left. This ended up with a com-ev which was held and I did all the recommendations and was reinstated in Good Standing. I would say that being on staff completely changed my life. I got a brand new view upon work and responsibility. A person is responsible for his/her own life and work. On staff in Church of Scientology you cannot blame anybody for the lack of own performance. You and only you are responsible for the area of your work. This is a fantastic point of view as it leaves the person entirely in charge and responsible. I have had this viewpoint even since and I would say that it has helped me tremendously in achieving greater success in my life ever after.

After leaving staff in early 1987 I put my full attention on going up the Bridge. In 1988 I attested to OT III. As a staff I had FPRD, some of the Grades and plenty of sec-check and my ethics situation had changed. OT III gave me tremendous case gains and completely changed my viewpoint upon the theta universe, the mest universe and what case is. In 1991 I did OT IV which was also great. In 1994 I started on OT V, NOTs.

NOTs was quite unique in it's simplicity and I had some fantastic wins from it. But I also had sometimes the feeling that the material run wasn't really real. Like a strange uncertainty about what had been run. Yet, I had some great case gains on it as well.

The OT levels I have done in the Church has been life changing. I have achieved a higher state of spiritual awareness. I have not become OT (Operating Thetan = A person who can exteriorize from his body and operate freely as a spirit with no physical boundaries) but I have definitely reached a new and higher understanding of mankind, why we do as we do, and that gives me certainty and stability every day of my life. In addition my IQ has increased and last time I was tested my score was 145 out of 150.

As a Scientologist I have often been confronted with entheta (negative talk) about the Church. Stories from the press that somebody had been locked up in a small room for days, that the Church lost a big court case and so on. You all know what I am talking about. People challenge you because they know you are a Scientologist. That's alright, challenge is a good thing. But because of all the wins I received from my Scientology Auditing and Training, I have always been more interested in trying to explain these stories as lies and Black Propaganda from our enemies, than in actually finding out the truth for myself.

It gets almost into a sport to find ways to justify rather than confronting the out point and start searching for the underlying situation. No doubt the entheta stories are often lies, or minor situations blown totally out of proportion, but there is no way they all categorize as such. There is simply too much material, and too many people from around the world testifying to similar experiences. Until 1996 I was still utterly rejecting all the terrible stories one hear, but then something happened which dramatically opened my eyes...


My first hand experiences with Top Management

While reading on, you might think "Why does this Robert Dam completely forget to also look at the plus points!" Well, since I started in 1984, I have been focussing heavily on the plus points and intensely neglecting the out points. There are many plus points, no doubt about that, otherwise I would have left the Church many years ago. But it all boils down to one thing: L Ron Hubbard's Standard Tech. The Tech really works. Far too many great successes to be all lies and manipulations. Great personal successes are achieved through auditing and training throughout the world.

Yes, I have been looking at plus points in all my existence as a Scientologist, now it is time to face the out points, they have been piling up and been neglected for too long. It is tough, yes, I have personally gone through hell, but somebody once said that it is a tough universe and only the tigers will make it. Even they have a hard time.

So, I decided to take a new look at things, research the scene behind the Church of Scientology being open to any conclusion. And I found testimonies and situations about Top Management so well documented, and from so many different sources that it simply could not be pushed aside as lies and Black Propaganda.

Okay, one step back, we are in the late eighties and I was working in the graphic business. We did printing jobs for different customers amongst others three of the Scientology Sea Organinzations:

 New Era Publications. A Church owned publishing house, publishing Hubbards books, lectures and study materials. It is located in central Copenhagen.
 AOSH EU. Advanced Organizatin Saint Hill. The main service organization in Europe located in central Copenhagen.
 CMU EU. Central Marketing Unit, not anymore existing.

In 1992 the company I worked in, Heimann & Jensen Grafisk ApS, shut down and I continued to work for AOSH EU, printing their two main magazines "The Auditor" and "Advance". To do this I opened a company called United Print & Mail. I had found a very viable way of printing and mailing their magazines and saved the organization literally millions of Danish kroner.

In November 1996 a situation occurred with AOSH EU. Their GI (Gross Income) had been down for more than one month, I think it was close to two month. International Management looked into the situation and the first thing they suspected was that the organization had not send out their magazines as scheduled. The magazines are known to influence the income, and when income is down management usually look at the outflow (outflow = sending out of magazines and promotional letters).

This situation was no exception. Management was informed that I was printing and mailing the magazines for AOSH EU. They got suspicious about this and thought that I had in fact not printed nor mailed out the number of magazines I was supposed to. They thought that I had printed maybe 10% of the quantity paid for, made sure that all the AOSH executives got a sample, and then just pocketed the rest of the money.

Well, that would have been fraud and no such thing ever happened. Also I did not know that there were names of selected AOSH executives included on the mailing list. Even if I had known, it would have been pretty much impossible to locate those names on a paperlist of about 70.000 names. Highly unlikely I would have found those names. And besides, I did not know the names of all the executives.

Never the less, I was ordered to provide all my book keepings which I refused. I do not believe that any client can order a supplier to show his books. An annual report is a diffent matter as that is anyway public, but books are internal papers which only the tax office can demand. The Management organization CLO EU (Continental Liaison Office Europe) was running the investigation. CLO EU is the ruling authority of all Scientology Churches in Europe.

Three of their staff came to my house to make me submit my books. In the end I gave in and delivered what they wanted. They studied it and I was called to a meeting taking place in New Era Publications. This was in beginning of December 1996. They had discovered a few unpaid bills and wanted to discuss various things. However, they could not come up with any evidence that I had committed fraud as that had never happened.

Failing to find evidence in my books they changed tactics: Two Security staff came to my house and ordered me to follow them into AOSH EU which I did. As we walked from the parking lot to the org they took their positions, one ahead of me and one behind me. They started giving messages on their radios that we were approaching the building. It was a ridiculous dramatization I felt, but it got worse.

As we entered the org I found that people who I usually greeted looked away. Nobody greeted me. The atmosphere was tense. Security staff was plenty in number. They were all monitoring my arrival, placed at key locations in the building. I suppose they were afraid I would try to escape. It was almost like something you see in a Hollywood film.

I was escorted to the executive meeting room at the top floor. In the room was the Commanding Officer CLO EU (Walther Kotric), the Commanding Officer CMO EU and five other Top EU executives. Security staff in both doors, blocking the way should I try to escape. At that point I was fully aware that something not nice was going to happen.

As I sat down Walther Kotric, sitting next to me, started shouting at me. Using full lung capacity he shouted "You little piece of shit. You useless fucking arsehole, tell us what you have done" "You are just a criminal, now confess how you ripped off the org" all such things. He was extremely antagonistic. Of course I refused to confess something I had not done, and then the CO CMO took over in same style. The other executives joined in now and then.

As we didn't get anywhere they ordered me to stay at the Church premises over night. They wanted me sec-checked (Auditing proceduce where a person is asked about his wrong doings and has to answer. If one does not want to answer, ones further progress in Scientology will be blocked). But it was late evening and all Auditors had gone home to sleep.

I refused being kept against my will and was somehow able to leave without being followed by Security. They were calling RTC Int and were not quite sure what to do, and in their confusion I just left the building.

The next day they ordered me in again. I arrived and got a sec-check. Security staff was guarding outside the auditing room. We of course didn't get anywhere with the sec-check as I still hadn't done the crimes they accused me of. I was told to clear with Security every time I wanted to leave the building.

This went on for several weeks.

One evening the Continental Justice Chief (working at CLO EU) came to our house. She insisted that I followed her to the org right away. I refused, but she persisted. My wife broke down completely as we had already been under intense pressure for weeks. I had to physically move her out of the house and lock the door. That same evening we had a social visit to go to, and as we walked to the car we discovered the Continental Justice Chief parked with her driver outside our house. They approached us, but we went into the car quickly. As we drove away they tried to follow us, but I managed to lose them.

The next day they decided that I could not leave the org. I had a business meeting in town and had to leave. Two Security staff blocked my way out of the room. I told them that it was illegal and that they were actually guests workers in my country, and as such had to adhere to the Danish laws not to speak of human rights. But that didn't seem to bother them.

(Speaking of human rights: This is something the Church makes a big deal out of when anybody opposes the Church. But it is a complete joke. Ask anybody who has been on the RPF and you are likely to find that the term is completely non-existent within the Church).

While I was being kept in the org, two Sea Org members arrived to my house to speak to my wife. They tried to Black PR me, insinuating that I had confessed being with other women when travelling in Singapore and that I had committed crimes against the Church etc. Outright lies. I was still being kept in the org and was told that I would go in session for more sec-check as soon as the Auditor was ready.

Before the session started, I told the Auditor that I had enough. I would not continue to allow this wild dramatization, being physically detained against my will, my wife being subject to Black Propaganda etc. I also mentioned that my wife's uncle was Deputy Chief of Police Copenhagen and that I would not hesitate to call him from my cell phone should they try to detain me once again. After sec-check I was told to stay in the waiting area because I had to see somebody.

Less than half an hour later, Michael from the Office of Special Affairs EU, sat in front of me. He tried his best to calm things down and said that of course I could always leave the org when I wanted and that it was just a misunderstanding. I should just cooperate a little then everything would be fine.

One or two days later I was with the MAA/Ethics Officer and the Commanding Officer CMO EU. They wanted me to cognite (cognite = getting a personal realization) on what a horrible person I had been. I know I'm no angel, but this was completely out of line. They ordered me to be in the org to continue next morning which was not possible for me. The Commanding Officer CMO said straight out that she would give me until 16:00 and if I hadn't arrived by then she would issue an SP declare on me. Suppressive Person declare means that you are a bad person who wants to destroy all of Scientology and you are therefore abandoned, rejected by the Church.

The next day I arrived just in time to avoid being SP declared and I was ordered to go to Flag (mother Church in Florida) to see the RTC General Inspector, Marty Rathbun sometimes called Mark Rathbun (it's the same person). He is the very top man second in RTC and Scientology only outranked by David Miscavige. I must have been considered a very serious threat, since he would be bothered to come to Florida to deal with me directly. He is usually situated on the West Coast.

2nd January 1997 I sat on a plane to Tampa, Florida. Arriving at Flag I first meet with John Stompke, IG MAA, RTC and later I met with Marty Rathbun. I don't remember which sequence, but they both sec-checked me. Marty Rathbun was persistent trying to get me to confess the same crimes I hadn't done, which I refused. He got upset with me a said that my future as a spiritual being was at stake and that I'd better come straight. I was in a state of confusion as I did not know what to do. I would never ever admit to crimes I hadn't done, yet I was under the clear impression that if I didn't, I would not be allowed back on the Bridge (couldn't continue my progress). This is a serious threat to someone who has experienced that OT levels actually work and therefore believe they are the only route to spiritual freedom.

Before going to Flag I had written a very detailed Knowledge Report on the whole scene at AOSH EU, Security, CO CLO EU, CO CMO and so fourth. I had been very careful not to write in an emotional way, but to stay on facts as to what actually had happened. It was quite detailed with dates, names etc. (unfortunately I lost the report when my old computer crashed down, otherwise it would have been attached here).

I asked Marty Rathbun if he had read my Knowledge Report and he answered "Yes, I read your report and it is just natter". This did not make sense to me at all, as the report was specific and detailed and exposed huge out points and off-policy on behalf of the involved staff members. It did not have snide remarks, so natter was not at all the case.

I started to fear that I would get nowhere at Flag either. Marty Rathbun wrote an etchis study program for me and John Stombke assigned an Auditor to do further sec-checking. The study program included State of Man lectures and other good stuff. I was quite pleased having time to study some hardcore LRH data on O/W and responsibility. Great stuff. But problem quickly occurred with the assigned Auditor. He was only Class IV intern and Clear or not even Clear (don't remember) and I was on OT V, NOTs. The poor Auditor had no chance to sec-check me. Strange that such an error would be made at Flag, The Mecca of Technical perfection!!! And even in an RTC matter. After all RTC is the organization supposed to safeguard the purity of LRH Technology!!! They had already my PC folders and knew exactly where I was on the Bridge.

Next day I was on the meter with John Stombke. His apprentice sat next to him also watching the e-meter. After sec-check I requested a Class IX auditor which I got. My following sec-check was concentrated on whatever less than perfect magazines I had printed and mailed for AOSH EU. They apparently accepted that I would not confess the crimes they wanted me to and the complete lack of evidence made them change tactics: I had to have my bookkeeper in Denmark draw up a summary of all the mags I ever printed for AOSH EU. I was then sec-checked on each single printing job to see if there was anything less than perfect on that particular job. Then to find out what amount of money I should return to the Church as compensation.

The following facts was not considered when establishing the amounts to be refunded:

 AOSH EU had saved literately millions on dealing with me.
 AOSH EU always received, and accepted an exact price quotation from me before every single print job, and I never failed to deliver the products described in the quotations.
 Printing in Africa on completely substandard and old machines made it more or less impossible to turn out perfect printing. Yet, the quality I managed to produce was definitely acceptable to European standards and far exceeded anything the local printers had ever before produced. Actually, one time the local printing company printed 4000 extra copies of Advance because they wanted to mail it out to their entire customer base, to show the fantastic printing quality they could produce.
 The AOSH EU executives was very satisfied with me as a supplier and I received several Commendations for my work for the org.

Nevertheless I did the sec-check and finished it off and left Flag with an ethics program from John Stombke.

I also had to sign an affidavit which OSA (Office of Special Affairs) drew up with details on the printing jobs that had come up in sec-check and the amount of money I accepted to refund to the org. When I read it now, I have a hard time figuring out why I would ever sign such a statement. It is heavily exaggerated and worded in a way that makes me look like a crook. But I was frightened of loosing my Bridge, not getting access to any further OT levels. I also wanted the nightmare to come to an end and to get home to my family.

Signing this affidavit was a break of my integrity. I accepted a lie in order to obtain freedom (further OT levels). I am sure you see how this doesn't fly. Freedom is truth. It is as simple as that. Since that time I have not been moving on the Bridge. I have nobody but myself to blame. I gave in and signed. No matter how much pressure, I could have kept my position and refused, but I didn't, couldn't face the consequences.

This web page is my way of restoring integrity by making the thuth known. After returning back to DK I completed my ethics program and paid back the money in terms of printed matters delivered to AOSH EU. The RTC Representative at AOSH EU, Alex Marty suggested that I delivered printed matters to AOSH as it was anyway a company matter (between my company and AOSH as the customer). I agreed to this. Once the outstanding amount was settled I asked to be restored in Good Standing. This was in summer 1999.

Alex Marty refused to issue a restoration to Good Standing Issue, as he said that I had never been in bad standing in the first place. Strange viewpoint as my name had been seriously smeared, not only within the organization, but in all of the Danish Scientology Society. Commanding Officer CLO EU, Walter Kotric, had held several briefings where he announced that I was the reason for the low income of AOSH EU. He told that I was guitly of fraud against the org. Clearly the complete absense of evidence didn't bother him at all. Alex Marty knew that, but the Church og Scientology has a huge problem admitting it's mistakes and this was no exception. I continued the dialog for weeks, months, in an attempt to be restored through the correct lines and have my name cleared, but with no result.

In the end I decided to become an Honor Roll member of IAS (International Association of Scientologist). This is for people who donate US$ 20.000,00. There are various status' one can achieve simply by donating money, and Honor Roll obviously is quite prestigious. The person who accepted my donation (Joachim from IAS) had promised that I would be photographed for the monthly magazine IMPACT, as all the other people who obtain such a status. As he said "This will really show them that you are in Good Standing no matter what anyone says."

Joachim was quite on my side. I am pretty sure about that, even though the donation counted on his statistic and therefore was in his interest in more than one way. And the day came for the big celebration and I was photographed on stage with my Honor Roll Plaque, and was also photographed in a group picture in the lobby. When the IMPACT magazine arrived a few weeks later, I was eager to see my picture, but that was being too optimistic. I had been retouched out of the pictures. I was nowhere to be found. Shocked and disappointed I wrote a letter to the Chief Editor asking for the reason. He replied that he had not been permitted to bring my picture.

Armed with new evidence, that there was obviously a need for clearing my name, I went back in touch with local RTC. This time they invited me in for a meeting with the MAA/Ethics Officer. But on the meeting she just said that I should get some more sec-checking, and it was obvious that they had no plans of clearing my name.

And thus I had to write this story as nobody else would.

I would like to show you two great definitions of justice from LRH (Management dictionary). They are quite applicable here I think:
Definition 8. "Justice would consist of a refusal to accept any report not substantiated by actual, independent data, seeing that all such reports are investigated and that all investigations include confronting the accused with the accusation and where feasible the accuser, before any disciplinary action is undertaken or any condition assigned. While this may slow processes of justice, the personal security of the individual is totally dependent upon establishing the full truth of any accusation before any action is taken."

Definition 15. "Don't ordinarily put a head on a pike unless it's the right head. But remember that there are times when it's vitally necessary to put some head, any head, on a pike to quell rising disorder. Just remember that justice is an action to deter disorder and secure the public safety. But if you do put the wrong head on a pike, be sure to put it back on the body again as soon as the need for its being on a pike is over."

Link to web site for more information