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Saturday, 22 December 2012
Alanzo's Story PDF Print E-mail
I was on two courses at once. And there was one more thing that I didn't mention: Back in Peoria, I had completed the Purif and started on the FPRD Basic List. Well, I had used up more than 2 intensives on the first question alone!

The question was something like "Do you have a back-off?" and it would just not quit reading! I had win after win on it. Running down chains way back into "thetan in the universe" incidents with exploding suns and postulating objects into existence and TONS of confusions and somatics and even popping out of the universe. I blew implants, I screamed and I cried. I sometimes stumbled out of session made of jell-o, unable to walk and could only lie down on the couch and laugh and line charge for hours in the pc waiting area. I would have floating TAs, F/Ns lasting for weeks, and shifts in viewpoint after viewpoint.

But I was still just on the first question!

Andy and George decided that, given the time it would take to get me through the second question, let alone the whole rundown, the planet might already be dead. So they shipped me off to LA for my training anyway. It wasn't optimum, but we would just "make it go right".

So okay. Here I was in LA, on two courses at once, and in the middle of the FPRD. Well, the first question of it, anyway.

I was constantly being sent to ethics. I would sit there doing TR Zero from 9am to 6pm, a full 8 hours of it, and my head would go black. Dark clouds with lightening would appear around my head and I would usually want to kill somebody. Bill Skrivfars SCREAMED that students didn't have cases, and I would agree and go back to drilling TR Zero again. But I kept thinking about the FPRD, and it was really clear to me that I needed to finish it.

This was, of course, totally out-ethics and I was totally being a panty-waiste dilettante as an auditor-in-training. And the more they tried to get my ethics in as a student, and the more I would try, the more the thunderstorms and the tornadoes would return. I got to know the Ethics personnel very well at ASHO. And the rest of the staff, too. They would muster down in the hallway in front of the ethics office. I was normally there, sitting on the ethics bench. I got to see roll call of the staff and the briefings from the CO a lot.

I was soaking up every bit of it.
One day, my head was black again, sitting in my chair in theory.

Melanie Murray had been in the CMO and worked with LRH and Miscavage, and all the rest. She was busted for some reason unknown to me at the time and made to retrain her entire Bridge. She was doing her Pro Sup's Internship and was running the course room that day.

Pink sheets in hand, she approached me. "What's happening?" she said.

"I'm fucked up." I told her the story, as I'd told dozens before her.

She said, "It sounds like we need to take a look at your pc folders. Where are they?"

"They're at my mission in Peoria."

She stood upright. She paused and looked at me. "They're at your mission in Peoria?" I immediately recognized this as a Q&A. I would flunk her for out TRs if I had the standing to.

"Yes. I'm a staff member there, here on work-study."

She blinked. "I have a father in a mission in Peoria. And a brother and a sister-in-law, too."

"Gerorge? George Seidler?"

"Yeah, that's my dad."

Going up a pitch, I said, "Andy???"

"That's my brother, Cindy is my sister-in-law"

"Hah! But your last name is Murray!"

"That's my married name: Melanie Seidler-Murray."

"Hah!"

We became instant best friends. And to this day, I miss her very much.

She made a call immediately, and my folders were on their way. Melanie and I would eat lunch together. She would tell me stories about working for LRH in the CMO. We'd talk about Andy and George. We'd talk about books by Richard Bach and Dostoyevski. She'd teach me about some of the ways of Scientology that were a mystery to me so far.

She had a husband in the movie business named Pat. The two of them were in the old training films on Pro TRs. Pat starred in the original "Problems of Life" film.

Melanie had worked with LRH and David Mayo. And, from what I can piece together from the stories she told me over the years (Melanie always made sure to put the best PR spin on every story), when Mayo was busted, she and Pat routed out of the Sea Org and Melanie was declared as an SP. Through a long and drawn out justice cycle lasting years and many bureaucratic turnovers, she was able to overturn her declare.

And now she was retraining back up to Class 8 at her own expense.

I tried to reconcile Malanie's stories at the time with what I knew about Scientology ethics and justice, but I just couldn't make it fit. I figured I just needed to get my case handled then it would all make sense.

In fact, if I had any critical thought at all, through all my ethics handlings and every other handling I was getting, I knew that it was probably just my FPRD case kicking in, and that I should just come back up tone and set my case aside.

When my folders arrived, I became a target for regging by Craig Sargent, and Ruthie Silverman, and Lester - all of the Div 2 reges at ASHO. But I didn't have any money, and since I was a work-study student, contracted on staff, I was sure that we could make it go right to get my auditing from a BC student, and get me back on course and training to Class 6.

That's when I found out that BC Interns, and all other Interns, audited paying pcs in the HGC. No one audited for free.

I had really really fucking come to the end of my rope. It was looking like I was damaged goods, unable to fit anywhere in the massive wheels of Scientology organization. No one knew what to do with me.

And, to top it off, the CO Manor had gotten busted and the whole staff, including me on work-study, was put on rice and beans.

I was here in California, and ALL my time was taken up between ASHO and the Manor. I hardly ever even got to see a movie, or walk down Hollywood Blvd. And now I was eating rice and beans.

I was starting to get sick of it.

So one night, I decided that I was going to drive up the coast to Monterrey, taking Highway One, because I wanted to see the land of Steinbeck and smell the ocean. After course on Friday, instead of going on post, I just took off.

It was beautiful. I returned on Sunday and walked into the new CO's office. He screamed at me and told me that I had blown and that I was expelled from work-study. I went up to my room and all my belongings were gone. I went back down to the CO's office and he told me that when I blew, they confiscated all my property. If I worked up through liability, I would get it back.

For liability, I had to buy a set of tapes or something from him. He gave me my stuff back and all kinds of things were missing, cheap jewelry, mostly, and some shoes.

What the fuck ever. I found a place around the corner from the complex on New Hampshire. It was a house with bunk beds filling every open space.

At least now I could concentrate on studying.

But that didn't work either, as the same shit continued to occur.

So, after 5 months, I had completed no courses, and I was completely dejected. I was a total loser. We decided that I should just come back. So I went through a hellacious and dev-T filled routing out process with lots of screaming at ASHO. Ken Shapiro had been made the CO now. And he was the one to sign off the final step of my routing form.

"I hate to see you leave, Mr. Alanzo," he said in his booming big being voice.

"I know, but it really is the greatest good for the greatest number of dynamics." He signed it.

I was free!

I packed up the Dianetics Mobile and took off.

With $58 in my pocket, I headed out on the 2,000 mile trip back to Peoria.

The price of gasoline was between $1.15 and $1.20 in the first 6 months of 1986.

The Dianetics Mobile was a 1984 Honda Civic that got over 30 miles to the gallon on the highway. I figured that if I didn't buy any food, and spent it all on gas, I would still come up around $12 short.

Oh well, I'll just have to make it go right.

I had a few cans of Coke and some bread and crackers in a paper bag in the back seat. There might have been some cheese in there, too.

I took the northern route through Colorado and slept in rest stops in my car. For some reason that, today, I still can not fathom, I had taken my 13" black and white TV with me to LA. It was in the front seat next to me. In a small town west of Denver, I sold the TV at a used furniture store for $20.

Now, with this extra $20, if I only bought one or two meals in the 2 days more it would take to keep driving straight through, I would make it.

I rolled into my parent's driveway on "E", totally exhausted, 2 days later.

It was when I got out of the car, and looked at the parent's house, that I knew I had changed. Today I realize how profoundly I had changed, but back then, I only knew that there was a change in my worldview.

I now saw things in a very disciplined, almost para-military way. The losses and humiliations I had suffered in LA did not diminish my purpose to Clear the Planet one bit - they had strengthened them.

I now knew what was necessary to get the Mission on track. I was out-qualed for the Sea Org as I had taken LSD. But, nonetheless, I was going to be a Sea Org member right there in Peoria to make that mission contribute to planetary clearing.

With this new viewpoint, I still felt like a complete failure. And when I showed up at the mission the next day, George greeted me with open arms. There was not one hint of censure or disapproval at all in his whole presence.

He just audited me.

And it was SUCH a relief!

Through Green Forms and C/S Series 40's, student repair lists and lots of handlings, I no longer felt like a total loser, but instead, I was rehabilitated right back to, and even more enthusiastic than before.

The mission was only open 7pm to 10pm Monday through Fridays. I moved a mattress on to the floor of one of the abandoned auditing rooms and told my parents and George and Andy that I was going to "align my dynamics" to the mission. And that meant that if the mission suffered, I would suffer. If the mission prospered, I would prosper.

And that was all there was to it.

So I kind of made my own little Sea Org right there in Peoria. I was a Sea Org of one, and let me tell you, that was plenty.

Of course, the first thing that needed to be done was to get everyone's ethics in.

Why else would we have no public? Why else would we only be open 15 hours per week? My God! Wogs were burning in the witch pit! We have a virtual monopoly on knowledge of the mind, two Class 8s and a Class 6, and we're only open 15 hours per week?

George was the Mission Holder, and Andy was the ED. Applying the principles of "Post from the top down", which I had learned in LA, I demanded that Andy give me the post of Hubbard Executive Secretary. I would hold HCO from above, as well as Ethics Officer, and I get ethics IN, and would establish this mission for blood.

Especially with all that I had "learned" while being handled by Sea Org members in LA and seeing how it was really supposed to be done.

Cary Goulston was the CO SMI EUS, and Andy was only too happy to give me the job of calling the stats into Cary every Wednesday night. Cary was a screamer and a throat-ripper, and a completely unreasonable idiot on the phone. And that was fine with me.

It seemed to me at the time that Cary was the only one who "got it". Andy and George were these kindly old fumblers, were obviously out-ethics, and had made a dog's breakfast of this mission.

Cary and I were going to handle it, fully and terminatedly.

I can remember my first project of going to work recruiting people in the field.

The Peoria Mission, as the longest running mission in North America, had a huge Central Files. I immediately started a call in campaign to clean up the ARCXen field, brush off any reasonableness I might run into, and revitalize their purpose.

This was the summer of 1986. There were long time Scientologists in the field, OTs no less, who would have nothing to do with the mission, or Scientology any more. This, to me, was a major outpoint. And I was going to get to the bottom of it.

I brought in one ball of entheta after another. They all new what needed to be done, and they all told me to get to it. Well, I had a little different view of it than that. THEY were out-ethics, and whatever problem they had, was at it's root, obviously, an overt. And so THEY needed to write up their overts and withholds and get back to contributing to clearing the planet!

I learned that the mission used to have 100s of thousands of dollars in reserves. They had it in gold and cash in bank accounts and safety deposit boxes. Yet this 6,000 square foot building we were in was 7 months late on the rent. There was no money in any accounts any more.

Something had happened?

What was it?

As HAS HFA, I started recruiting right and left. While I was away, my sister had become much more interested in Scientology. She signed a 2.5 year contract to train up to be the Course Supervisor. Randy Spurgeon was the son of a woman who had been in the Sea Org, Carrie Spurgeon. Randy signed a contract and was made the HAS. Then we found Barb, a girl from a small town nearby, and she took over Treasury. Tim Crowley’s brother Luke had been a cop, and had just won a big legal settlement. Carrie Spurgeon was coming in a lot more to help out on staff and she got Luke to buy his whole Bridge at Flag with his settlement money and sign a five year contract to be the Mission OES.

Andy was at the end of his last five year contract and he and Cindy were going to move to LA. Cary went on a tour of the “Cont.” and came to the mission one day. He and Andy sat me down in the ED’s office. I think he brought another ED from the East Coast with him. Cary said that I should take over for Andy as ED.

“Me? I’m just a Mini hatted HES. And anyway, I’m going back out to LA to get trained. My goal is to make 5 clears per week!”

“Well, how many clears per week do you think you could make as an ED? Then you’ll have a whole team of auditors to make Clears with.” I actually bought that. If my goal was to make Clears, and thus Clear the planet, then he was right – I could make a lot more Clears as an ED than as a single auditor.

And just like that, I gave up my goal to be an auditor.

I was going like gang-busters. But I was basically all alone, living alone in the mission at night, alone during the day, answering the phones and keeping the mission open. I wore all the hats until the rest of the staff came in at 7pm.

One Friday night, I had had enough. It was too much, really. Andy was in tonight, and he would be headed to LA pretty soon. I took a shower, put on a shiny nylon shirt and some cologne, and took off to the bars downtown. I was going to get laid.

I went to a local bar and started talking to some of my old wog friends who I had not seen for over a year now. As we talked, a girl walked up and I said hi to her. We started talking and I found that she had read many of the same books I had read – a lot of Carlos Castenada and others. I asked her if she had ever read Dianetics, and she said that she had always meant to. We left together that night, bought some beer and a scratch lotto ticket at a gas station. The lotto ticket won!

We “nested” for three days straight. I had completed the Minister’s Course in my training to be able to use the meter for exams, and whole laying in bed, I told her that I was a Minister in the Church of Scientology. This seemed to have a kind of subversive appeal to her, having grown up a Baptist in Missouri.

On Monday night, I took her in wearing a leather mini skirt and showed her the Bridge to Total Freedom. I said, “See, we’re actually timeless immortal beings who, over time have become degraded to the point where now we can only run these bodies. This Bridge is a series of steps designed to rehabilitate us back to our original state so that we regain all our lost abilities and become powerful again.”

She said, “Fantastic! What’s the first thing I do?”

“Well, you get onto this course.”

And so I had personally achieved a First Service Start.

Andy said that was an excellent way to make up for blowing Friday night. And now I had a girlfriend who was into Scientology!

A couple months later I got her to sign a staff contract and she became the new PES.

So now I had an HES, an OES and a PES. Andy and Cindy left for LA, and I became the ED.

Cary would call at least three times per night. He would always have an urgency in his voice. As soon as you answered the phone, he would say, in machine gun fire language, "What are you doing?"

I would say that I was making folders for my drawer. "NO! You should not be doing that on post time! This is prime production time! Where are the First Service Starts??"

"We're at 3 for the week." (This was phenomenal)

"THREE??? Jesus! Connecticut gets that in one DAY! Who's body routing?"

"Well, Tim's passing out promo at the mall."

"Shit. That's bull shit. You need to get 5 people out there! Think Big Alanzo!!! What about some students? The Birthday Game ED says that you should get the public involved and you should brush off any reasonableness you bump into. How many students on course?? Can you get to them on break? Get them out there! All hands out handing out promo!!!"

"We have 5 people on course."

"5??? You gotta get that place booming! When I call back I want there to be 4 First Service Starts. And in order to get that you need to OUTFLOW. OUTFLOW EQUALS INFLOW ALANZO - START!!!"

Then he'd slam the phone down and do that to someone else on the “Cont”.

The thing is, I would hop to it. I would take that same manic energy and go around to all the staff and spray it at them.

I wasn;t very popular. But so what? I was a fire-breathing product officer and I got products.

I really didn't notice how much of an asshole I had become. I had been taught to be UNREASONABLE, and I had taught to be FIRE-BREATHING, I had been taught GET MAD, as that was how I achieved ETHICS PRESENCE.

This had been the way I was treated while in LA, and I had learned "the winning valence". And swallowed it up.

This was the technology which was going to save the planet!

Who was I to question it? Every time I had, I had been slammed and told I was out-ethics, a critical natterer, and asked to write up my overts.

And every time, I found overts to write up, too.

So it must be true.

I was now, very fully, a Scientologist.

In the late 1990's, after being a Scientologist for 15 years, a Clear, and a staff member for 7.5 years, and having a job that paid 6 figures, I was facing bankruptcy.

I had decided that I would never go into debt again for anything. And I had been studying LRH finance policy, and trying to get some kind of help from this subject that is supposed to "improve conditions in life."

I was told that I needed to get on course and get up the Bridge. So I routed on to Solo 1.

This is a report I wrote at that time of my life.

I never received any kind of response from anyone on it at all.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

25 November 1999

RTC Reports Officer
Ethics Section AOLA
Qual AOLA
Deanna FCS AOLA
Tim Edwards AOLA
Alanzo
Solo Certainty Student


Things That Shouldn't Be
1. Pressuring Scientologists to squirrel the application of standard finance policy to their lives
2. Routing a student off course when no policy had been violated, and while the tech was going in.
Since two weeks before my annual IAS membership expired, the FCS AOLA has been working with me to renew my membership. Deanna began by asking me to put my membership on a credit card and going into debt for it. I told her that I have gotten myself $36,000 in debt and that this is a severely out-ethics scene for me. I explained over multiple conversations, adding up to many hours, that I had been applying ethics to this and reading LRH Finance policy to turn this scene around.

I had not been applying standard admin for so long in this area that it now threatened my progress on the Bridge and has even gotten me close to bankruptcy. I told her that, instead of pressuring me into going further into debt, that I needed her help me to apply standard finance policy and to FP for this membership so that I could both apply policy and get my membership paid for.

I arranged to pay $50 every week toward my membership. Each time I paid my check to Deanna, she told me that I just needed to get my membership now and to put it on a credit card. She accused me of being ARC broken with the IAS. She repeatedly said that I "could do better than this", that I was "selling my self short" by not just going into debt and paying for it now. She said that I was "not some low havingness person with no money" but that "I could do it". One time she (good-naturedly, and with good humor) put her hands around my neck to act like she was strangling me in frustration, saying "Don’t sell yourself short like this!" as I paid my FPed amount.

When my membership finally expired, Deanna told me that I couldn’t be on course without being an IAS member. Having studied the policies on membership very thoroughly, and being an Ethics Specialist, I knew this was untrue and asked her to show me the reference. She could not show me any reference. I began to feel like I was attending course "despite not being an IAS member" - something no where in policy and not any kind of a standard for ethical behavior of a student.

I continued to make payments and Deanna continued to accept them. One night, on Tuesday, the 16th of November, I received a message from Deanna that she wanted to speak to me before course. My next payment was due, so I had planned to see her anyway to make my payment. I went in to the Atrium and sat down with her. Deanna's demeanor had totally changed. She puffed out her shoulders and got up right in my face and said that she had attended an IAS briefing and that she had decided that "this was total bullshit" and that I was going to pay right now. I told her that I would make my payment, but that, as we had discussed for over a month now, I was applying standard finance policy and that I would not go any further into debt for this or anything else.

This actually became a firefight. I set out my check card to make my payment and she refused it, saying that wouldn't accept any more of my payments. I told her that I had done a lot of conditions on this, and that it was abundantly clear to me that people who pressure me to go into debt and off finance policy are not my friends. There are plenty of references on this, not the least of which is 18 February 1982 CHANGING WORKABLE FINANCE SYSTEMS.

She, again, said that I shouldn’t be on course without my membership paid for. I got up to get away from her and make the payment to Tim Edwards. Then I saw that it was three minutes to course time and so I turned around to go upstairs and Deanna was there. She took me by the hand and tried to" 8C" me to Ethics. I told her that I was going to course, so she rode the elevator with me. She accused me of "using policy to stop", even though there was no stop as I had been making payments all along and would have made one to her had she not refused it.

I walked in just before roll call and Deanna stood outside. After roll, as I began getting set up for course, I saw Deanna come into the course room and start whispering into the supervisor's ear. Then, later, I saw Deanna come back into the course room and place a piece of paper into the Sup's inbox. It was extremely distracting but I continued on with my drill anyway.

Five minutes later, the Supervisor Joey Chait, came up to me during a drill with an ethics routing form and told me that I was being taken off course and routed to ethics. I took it and went downstairs to ethics. The KR was stapled shut to the RF. (I personally did not receive a copy and still do not have one. It should be available in my EO file.)

The ethics officer unstapled the KR and showed it to me and had me explain what happened. The KR said that I had told Deanna that anyone who tried to force me to go into debt was not a friend on of mine. It said further that this was "enemy line" and that "the string should be pulled".

I explained the situation that had just occurred with Deanna and asked to see any policy that I had been violating. I was fully willing to look at any overt that I might be committing that I'm not seeing. He said he couldn't think of a policy I might be violating, and didn’t mention any overt that I might be committing. He sent me to go see the video of the latest IAS event. I was taken off course at 8pm and sat and watched the video until 10pm. Then I went to Tim Edwards and paid the $50 payment I had always intended to pay.

On the following Saturday, my twin offered to lend me the money so that I could pay for my membership and I would pay her back on the same FP schedule that I would be paying the IAS. I accepted this and my membership is now paid, and I am, once again, in debt for it.

I write this because the pressure that was used to get me to quit applying standard LRH finance policy was tremendous, even threatening my progress on the Bridge by verbally stating a fictitious policy that "students shouldn’t be on course without their IAS memberships in force" and threatening to try to take me off course, despite no policy regarding this at all.

I also write this because the KR that Deanna wrote was not filed in my ethics file, per the policies on the matter, with me receiving a copy, but was used to actually take me off course in an emergency manner and being made to explain a KR which showed no evidence of a crime or even an off-policy action. This is actually a non-standard handling of ethics reports.

HCOPL 1 MAY 1965 STAFF MEMBER REPORTS states, "The most serious reports, which are the only ones taken up at once, are technical alter-is, noncompliance, any false reports, false attestations, no-reports, misdemeanors, crimes and high crimes. The others are left to accumulate (except in Emergency when all reports on that portion or org are taken up at once)."

HCOPL 17 MARCH 1965 RIGHTS OF A STAFF MEMBER, STUDENTS AND PRECLEARS TO JUSTICE, states, "There are no student rules and regulations except the Justice Codes. All others are abolished…"

This is true,

Alanzo

Here, I was "taking responsibility for the whole scene".


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26 December 1999

Greg Hughes
Gross Income Exec Int
Int Exec Strata
6331 Hollywood Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA 90028

Dear Greg -

I met you when I first moved to LA in the early 90's from Peoria, IL, where I was the Exec Dir at the mission there. I had just started working with Helmut Flasch. There was a WISE convention of Scientology consultants you had called at the Hollywood Guaranty building. You and I talked about Wally Gillin, with whom I know you went to college, and who you got to walk in the door of our mission for some "green on white".

I remember our conversation very well. You said, "Wally's kind of a dangerous guy." I blew down on that one!

I wanted to write you a letter. Some things have been happening around me out here in the field in LA that I think I should tell you about. I'd like you to know that these are solely my opinions and my observations and that I certainly could be wrong about these, but I still feel that I should communicate them to you. I will explain my personal situation.

I've never made more progress on the Bridge than in the last 4 years. In that amount of time, I have completed Levels D through G on the SHSBC, Study Certainty, my Pro TRs course, PTS/SP, the Pro Upper Indoc Course, the Ethics Specialist Course, and the Data Series Eval Course. On the processing side, I've completed my OT Preps. I am currently on my Solo Certainty Course at AOLA.

And now I'm bogged.

I'm bogged because I mishandled my finances in getting these services done. I paid for them all on credit cards. Being now $40,000 in debt, I can't see where the money will come from for my next service, OT Eligibility. All of my discretionary income is now going to pay the minimum payments on these credit card debts. And the way credit cards are rigged, this is a situation that is going to last for a very long time if I don't do something effective about it right now.

So I've been studying LRH Finance policies. I have applied these policies in many ways. I have good credit, but I have found that there are consumer credit counseling services who work with credit card companies to reduce the interest rates which lets you pay these off sooner. I have started a rigorous FP Number 1 plan which includes budgeting for Scientology services, control of my spending, and other measures.

After studying LRH finance policy in this area, I can’t really see why credit card companies are any kind of a way out, ever again, for me. How they ever became a way to buy Scientology services baffles me. It is crystal clear that the only way out for me is to get LRH Finance policy in on my life and to flow money the way he says to flow it.

When he says in 9 Mar 72RA, Finance Series 11 Income Flows and Pools, Principles of Money Management (MS2:349) that you shouldn't "commit expense beyond future ability to pay", and "don’t ever borrow", I think that he meant for Scientologists in the field to apply this, too - even to their own personal finances. I think this because he says it in 18 August 1971 On-Policy (OEC Vol 7: page 806) and elsewhere, including Keeping Admin Working.

So great. This is what I'm doing to handle my situation. Now. Why would I write you?

Before I answer that, let me tell you a story to illustrate a point I've recently cogged on from studying these policies. I've been studying the life of Thomas Jefferson. I don’t know if you are interested in him or not, but he is a fascinating character. He was one of the most effective advocates of freedom in history, and probably did more than anyone to advance the cause of freedom on Earth before LRH came along. It is my opinion that we are based in the US today because of what Thomas Jefferson did.

Did you know that, when he wrote the Declaration of Independence, he believed that we should abolish slavery as part of the new republic? He held that slavery was an "abomination to mankind". That the British had promoted slavery in America was written into his first draft as one of the reasons to revolt against them. This was too "politically incorrect" for the colonists of his time, though. They had to strike that clause from the Declaration in order to get all the delegates to sign it in 1776.

Yet, at the time Jefferson wrote this, he owned 125 slaves. On the day he died, on July 4th, 1826 (50 years to the day of the signing of the Declaration of Independence) he owned 250 slaves. It was a fairly common practice in the colonies and in the new republic for people to free their slaves if they didn’t like having them. Yet Jefferson was never able to do this, even though he hated owning slaves and felt it extremely degrading.

Do you know why he was never able to free his slaves? His creditors would never allow him to free them. Jefferson was in debt all his life. The slaves he held increased the value of his property, on which his creditors had liens. Jefferson handled his personal finances so poorly that he was never personally free enough to enact his own ideals in his own life.

How many Scientologists do you think would rather be on staff, or in the Sea Org, clearing the planet, than in working at their jobs moving MEST day in and day out? How many do you think would rather take off to Flag, or AO to do their services and get up the Bridge full time, rather than doing it piece-meal, here and there. Ask any staff member who does call-in - they act as if there is a ball and chain tied to their ankles. There is a datum going around that they are just PTS to the middle class. That may be true in some cases, but I think the majority can’t live their ideal lives because they don't apply LRH finance policy to their personal finances.

This is what I see that should be the ideal scene in the Scientology field: Each Scientologist applying LRH finance policy to their personal lives so that they are personally prosperous, resulting in a free and prosperous Scientology field that supports and flows tons of time and money into orgs, making them, in turn, rich, free, and prosperous with staff and treasure.

This is something that, in the present culture, has great resistance to it. Credit card companies are so deep into so many American's finances that we are creating a whole generation of slaves. To reach this ideal scene, the resistance to it has to be overcome and much work must go into creating this each day. I am personally creating this scene for myself, over hell and high water.

Unfortunately, the greatest resistance I am facing to creating this is from the org registrars who I am working with to continue my progress up the Bridge. It isn't that they are against LRH finance policy. They're not. It's that, I think, the only way they see to get their product of "the prospect pays in full at the time of service" is to - in my case - suggest more ways of my going further into debt, and then to insist on it.

When I tell them that the way I've been paying for my services is no longer sustainable, and is actually now being destructive to any further progress, it doesn’t seem to fit into any frame of reference for them. They brush it aside as just more case and talk to me about another credit card I can get. Credit cards seem to be a very firm stable datum in Scientology at this time.

In order to find the LRH on this - because it exists nowhere in the whole Finance series and in OEC Volume 3 - and is continually preached against by LRH in those policies on finance - I have asked a registrar to give me the LRH reference for going into debt to pay for my services. A couple of months ago, I was given two:

One reference was two paragraphs from PAB 79 THE OPEN CHANNEL, and another was one paragraph from HCOPL 27 April 59 WHY NEW BOOKS ARE FEW. These two had been excerpted and printed on paper, with a border around it, and copied by the registrar, seemingly to use on post and to hand out as a reference on whether it was standard to go into debt to pay for your Scientology services. This was given to me at AO by Tim Edwards. But he is certainly not the only registrar I've come across in my 15 years as a Scientologist who have encouraged me to pay for Scientology in this way.

And neither is Tim at all mono-maniacal about these references. However, he also has never listened to my solutions that are more on-policy because, I believe, that it doesn't allow him to get the product of "the prospect pays in full at time of service." Tim has continually suggested more ways of my getting into debt to pay for my services. Like I said, it seems to be his stable datum.



 
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